The Rational Basis® of Happiness Podcast

Transcript

The Selfish Path to Romance. Download chapter one for free at DrKenner.com.

Dear Dr. Kenner, kindly, I would like to know, how do psychologists avoid depression? So what images come to your mind? You know, someone comes into a psychologist's office and they're depressed and they're suicidal, or someone, a family, comes into a psychologist's office and they're fighting. Mom and Dad are yelling at the kids and yelling at each other. You know, how does the psychologist keep her head above water or keep his head above water?

So I'll continue with the email. This person wants to know, how do psychologists avoid depression? To me, they seem superior and could help many, many who suffer mental disorders, but as we know that humans are not made to bear others? pressure on them, I wonder how psychologists themselves avoid depression. I really hope you could give me an answer, as I am taking psychology in university as my major. Many thanks, Clara.

This is a good? as I said, this is a very good question.

Yesterday, I was talking to a police officer, Clara, and I saw the gun on his waist, and I was aware that he puts himself in life-and-death situations. I was imagining him walking into the middle of a street fight, and I said to him, ?You've got a tough job.? And he just looked at me, he smiled politely, and he said, ?No job is tough if you love what you're doing, and of course if you know what you're doing too.?

So I don't have his skills or his passion for going into dangerous, life-threatening situations. So for me, being a police officer?his job is tough. It is similar with clinical psychology. If you love the detective work of helping other people solve their own problems and giving them the skills for a lifetime so that they can solve their problems on their own?if you love the mind, if you love teaching thinking skills, the job can be exhilarating, not depressing.

And because what it's telling me is that change is possible. If there's something in you that you want to improve, whether you're overweight or you're smoking and you want to give up smoking, or you have a temper and you want to change that, or you have been a lifetime procrastinator and you want to change that, or you feel like you've always been pessimistic and you want to improve that? you really want to remake yourself?it is possible. It is not possible just by wishing it or praying for it or hoping that something will change with time. It's not this nebulous change. You get specific. How can you change? How can you change yourself?

And I love seeing that psychology is causal and that you can learn the principles and skills to lead a happier life. So you need to have, number one, the proper ideas of how the mind works. And when you go through school, whether it's college or even high school or graduate school, or if you're studying clinical psychology, you are going to be fed a whole bunch of?

Hey, I?ve got to interrupt this, because we've got to pay some bills. Thirty seconds, that's it. A very quick ad, and then Ellen will be back.

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And when you go through school, whether it's college or even high school or graduate school, or if you're studying clinical psychology, you are going to be fed a whole bunch of different theories about how the mind works. And man, if you're given the wrong instruction manual for the mind, you're going to not know how to help people as a clinical psychologist. But if you have the right instruction manual, if you have a reality-based, fact-based and principled guide to help people, it's going to be much easier and enjoyable for you.

So here's what I recommend. The foundation to any good theory is having it based on a rational philosophy?not a mystical, oozy philosophy where everything just seems shapeless. And the rational philosophy that I go by is the philosophy of Objectivism by Ayn Rand. There is an objective reality, and you can know it. And you can get her books. You can go to my website and read her fiction first?fascinating?she?s both a philosopher and a novelist. You can read Atlas Shrugged, one of the best-selling books now, and The Fountainhead. And you can also read, if you're more technical, The Virtue of Selfishness, or you can read Objectivism: The Philosophy of Ayn Rand, by Dr. Leonard Peikoff.

The second is to have wonderful skills. You can get skills from many different therapy methods, from?excuse me?different schools of therapy, provided you provide the rational basis for them. For example, I learned from family therapy, from motivational interviewing, from humanistic psychologists. But the gold standard of therapy, I say, is cognitive therapy. They teach wonderful thinking skills. So you can draw on many schools.

So you want to look at psychology as becoming a detective of the mind, and you better yourself in the process.

I'm Dr. Ellen Kenner on The Rational Basis of Happiness.

For more Dr. Kenner podcasts, go to DrKenner.com and please listen to this ad. Here's an excerpt from The Selfish Path to Romance by Drs. Kenner and Locke:

Although many important personality traits are valuable in romance, some can properly be a matter of personal preference. Some partners enjoy more humor, some less. Some prefer gregarious partners; others prefer a more introspective, quiet one. Some like a person who enjoys spontaneity; others prefer planners. If partners are not well-matched or at least accepting of differences, such legitimate differences can result in chronic tension, painful arguments and a conflict-ridden relationship, even among partners who are good people. Partners sometimes mistakenly treat such optional personality traits as moral issues. Such differences may be legitimate reasons for not wanting one another as soul mates, but they don't make a person morally wrong.

You can download chapter one for free at DrKenner.com, and you can buy the book at Amazon.com.