Dr. Ellen Kenner
Clinical Psychologist
host of "The Rational Basis® of Happiness"


How to Ask
Dr. Kenner
a Question

(This has been a free public service since 1997)

Ask by phone:
The toll-free number is
Why free? See below.

Ask by e-mail:
Although you won't receive as thorough an answer as if you were to phone in live, you can still email Dr. Kenner a question

When to call:
Call any time before 10pm (Eastern Time). If she is not available, she will return your call as soon as she is free.

Call or e-mail?
You will receive the fastest, most accurate answer if you ask by phone. Most calls are answered. Not all emails are answered due to their large quantity.

What you can not ask:
Dr. Kenner does not take calls regarding suicide, medication, legal issues or any matter that threatens life or property and you must contact a local mental health professional, lawyer, doctor or the police if this is the case.

Why for free?
This has been a free public service since 1997. Why would a well known clinical psychologist answer your question for free and pay for the phone call too? Because Dr. Kenner makes her answer available on her podcast / talk show so others with the same issue can benefit. The show is a public service and is question-driven; your questions are the motor of the show.

This is not therapy
Although you will be receiving helpful advice from Dr. Kenner, remember that this is not therapy and cannot replace a fully contextual one-on-one relationship with a mental health professional.


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What's New

Independence -
1-The role of honesty in relationships 2-After being a full time housewife I have become a bitchy mom.
Begins at 1’30”
(today's podcasts)
(all podcasts)


Dating -
1-Physical vs intellectual independence 2-How do I ask out a girl I know has a boyfriend?
Begins at 1’37”
(all podcasts)


Enjoy all of Dr. Kenner's short podcasts on many topics.

    Today's Romance Quote    

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All quotes are from Ellen's and Ed's romance book:
The Selfish Path to Romance - How to Love With Passion and Reason
Buy now through Amazon
Table of Contents

    This Week's Article    

Secrets Happy Couples Know About Selfishness

Sara, like many others, has bought into the code of self-sacrifice: She feels good only when she martyrs herself, but that “good” feeling is short-lived and is soon replaced by feelings of self-betrayal (her shakiness) and resentment toward the man she once adored. ...(more)

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  Dr. Kenner has written many articles and presented many seminars (see below) and courses around the country. She is co-author of a serious guidebook on romance and has produced over 500 podcasts. See search bar above for topics.  

Courses and Seminars
What is Happiness

  • Comments by seminar attendees
  • Learn how you can schedule Dr. Kenner for a speaking engagement
  • To Purchase: Only items with links are available at this time for purchase, some through third party vendors.
Date Location Topic
1993 San Francisco Principles of Effective Communication
1993-4 Pascoag, RI

Anxiety Disorders in Traumatized Children
Depression in Traumatized Children
Separation and Loss Issues in Traumatized Children
Anxiety & Psychiatric Disorders in Traumatized Children

1994 Bermuda Principles of Effective Communication
1995 Newport, RI Overcoming the Me-versus-You Barrier
1995 San Francisco Understanding the Process of ``Self-change" and Some Effective Self-help Interventions
1995-6 Hasbrouk Hgts, NJ Objectivism as a guide to Self-change
  Los Angeles
  Washington, DC
  San Francisco
1997 Irvine, CA Skills to Minimize the ``Me-versus-You Barrier
1998 Providence You Matter, Your Happiness Matters
1998-9 Phoenix The RATIONAL Basis® of Romance Part 2
Courting Success in Romance.
  San Francisco
1999 Lake Tahoe The Benevolent Universe Premise: How to Capture and Secure Your Enthusiasm and Optimism
2000 Providence, RI The RATIONAL Basis® of Romance
2000 Richmond, VG Childhood As It Should Have Been and Ought To Be
Imagine going back to a typical day in your youth armed with your present philosophical knowledge. You would be able to ask yourself questions about your parents, such as: Did they help you grasp that the world is not crazy, but causal? Did they enable you to discover the joy of questioning and thinking? Did they show you how to deal effectively with "failure"—or to become value-oriented—or to protect yourself against altruism? Dr. Kenner presents the principles and skills that make parenting and childhood a pleasurable experience. Whether you want to raise children more effectively or want a better understanding of your own youth, this course offers you valuable insights.
(6hrs) Includes pdf of handouts

Available by mp3 download ($40) 10 files, 25meg/file, Item 010520
$3 total S&H will be added per order (other items available)
2001 Anaheim, CA

Psychological Self-Defense
Whether dealing with a deviously critical mother, a deliberately incomprehensible professor or an envious co-worker, how do you resist the tendency to "keep the peace," to forgive and make excuses for them—to apologize for the good within you? How do you remain morally true to yourself? How do you avoid granting them the "sanction of the victim"? In this course Dr. Kenner provides how-to advice on detecting and counteracting intentionally manipulative people.
With an abundance of examples—drawn from both real life and fiction—she explains the subtle methods by which manipulative people gain psychological footholds. Rather than being formal lectures, these six sessions include frequent questions from the students as well as staged confrontations in which Dr. Kenner plays the role of a manipulator. Though she sketches out some of the psychological principles involved, her central purpose is to teach practical skills that can help you maintain your integrity, pursue your happiness and navigate safely through the traps of would-be manipulators.

(5hr 40min) Includes pdf of handouts

Available by mp3 download ($40) 10 files, 25meg/file, Item 010510
$3 total S&H will be added per order (other items available)

2002 Toronto Maintaining Your Optimism
2002 Vienna, VG The RATIONAL Basis® of Romance Part 1
Choosing a Romantic Partner
2002 Palo Alto, CA Choosing a Romantic Partner
2003 Industry Hills, CA The RATIONAL Basis® of Romance Part 3
Strengthening and Preserving your Romantic Partnership
2004 Wintergreen, VA Bringing Out The Heroic in Yourself
2005 San Diego, CA Ayn Rand: Breathing Reason and Passion Back into Psychology
2006 Boston, MA Romance: Bringing Love and Sex Together
2009 Boston, MA Exploring the Psychological Visibility Principle as Illustrated in Atlas Shrugged