Dr. Ellen Kenner
Clinical Psychologist
host of "The Rational Basis® of Happiness"


How to Ask
Dr. Kenner
a Question

(This has been a free public service since 1997)

Ask by phone:
The toll-free number is
Why free? See below.

Ask by e-mail:
Although you won't receive as thorough an answer as if you were to phone in live, you can still email Dr. Kenner a question

When to call:
Call any time before 10pm (Eastern Time). If she is not available, she will return your call as soon as she is free.

Call or e-mail?
You will receive the fastest, most accurate answer if you ask by phone. Most calls are answered. Not all emails are answered due to their large quantity.

What you can not ask:
Dr. Kenner does not take calls regarding suicide, medication, legal issues or any matter that threatens life or property and you must contact a local mental health professional, lawyer, doctor or the police if this is the case.

Why for free?
This has been a free public service since 1997. Why would a well known clinical psychologist answer your question for free and pay for the phone call too? Because Dr. Kenner makes her answer available on her podcast / talk show so others with the same issue can benefit. The show is a public service and is question-driven; your questions are the motor of the show.

This is not therapy
Although you will be receiving helpful advice from Dr. Kenner, remember that this is not therapy and cannot replace a fully contextual one-on-one relationship with a mental health professional.


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What's New

Habits -
My wife alphabetizes all the written words she sees.
Begins at 5'37”
(today's podcasts)
(all podcasts)


Intimacy -
Marital intimacy - Use it or lose it - a short interview with D. Barry McCarthy.
Begins at 1’35”
(all podcasts)


Enjoy all of Dr. Kenner's short podcasts on many topics.

    Today's Romance Quote    

(Scroll for more)


All quotes are from Ellen's and Ed's romance book:
The Selfish Path to Romance - How to Love With Passion and Reason
Buy now through Amazon
Table of Contents

    This Week's Article    

Secrets Happy Couples Know About Selfishness

Sara, like many others, has bought into the code of self-sacrifice: She feels good only when she martyrs herself, but that “good” feeling is short-lived and is soon replaced by feelings of self-betrayal (her shakiness) and resentment toward the man she once adored. ...(more)

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  Parenting Articles  
  • The Rational Basis® of Parenting: You Can't Force a Mind      Part 1      Part 2
  • "Parent-partners": A rational plan for nurturing your child after your marriage ends
  • Beware of Forced Kindness - A Lethal Destroyer of Your Happiness
  • The aging parent
  Miscellaneous Parenting Topics  
  • Solutions for better parenting web site.
  • Art and Parenting - Using art to build your child's character.
  • School choice - Interested in the issue of school choice? Some things to consider.
  • Three simple child-management tips no parent should be without. Free parenting e-newsletter
  Private Schooling  

Some examples of what to look for in a private school:

  Home Schooling  

Information about home schooling

  Children's Books  

Books, tapes and movies for and about children

  Divorce and Kids  

Marriage vs happiness- When might marriage be an obstacle to happiness? When you discover that you and your spouse have come to hold different fundamental values. In such a case, what if you have kids? Should you still consider divorce ?

See also books on divorce and kids.

  Parenting Sound Bites  
  • Do you think that every child should have a session with a psychologist at least once before they turn eighteen? P1
  • Is summer camp good or bad for a child? P2
  Rational Romance  

Romance has a rational basis. Find out what The Rational Basis® of Romance is.

  Parenting books and seminars  

Books  and seminars concerning romance

  Home Schooling  

“This day I completed my 31st year. ...I viewed with regret the many hours I’ve spent in indolence, and now sorely feel the want of that information which those hours would have given me had they been judiciously expended. But since they are past and cannot be recalled, I dash from me the gloomy thought and resolved in future to redouble my exertions...“
               Merryweather Lewis, Aug 18, 1805

Often the choice to home-school your child is the wisest decision. There is much information available to make this an informed decision.

Some excerpts from the September 11, 2000 issue of  Time Magazine:
  • This year Sanford University accepted 26% of the 35 homeschoolers who applied - nearly double its overall acceptance rate.
  • Twenty-three of this falls 572 freshmen at Wheaton College in Illinois were homeschooled, and their SAT scores averaged 58 points higher than those of the overall class.
  • ...most colleges have a policy for dealing with (homeschoolers), and some schools are rolling out the red carpet.
  • This year homeschoolers scored an average of 1,100 on the SAT - a full 81 points above the national average...

And, from the January 8, 2001 issue of Time Magazine:
    ``Former secretary of Education William Bennett...announced last week that he will lead the nation's first for-profit online elementary and secondary school, called K12, that will begin enrolling students in grades K-2 next fall and will eventually have students in every grade. ...K-12's demanding courses are aimed primarily at home schoolers..."

  When You Are Old  

A writer to Ann Landers newspaper column lists these points to remember about how to behave with your children when you are  old. Although there is much valuable information here, be critical in your judgment because they are not appropriate in all contexts.

  1. When my children tell me I should no longer drive, I will believe them and quit, because I know they love me.
  2. When it becomes apparent that I need extra help, I will accept it from outsiders because my children cannot do everything. They have other obligations beyond my daily care.
  3. It is up to me to make my life fulfilling. It is not my children's responsibility. I must stay active and learn to entertain myself so I do not become a burden to them.
  4. If my children tell me I am becoming confused and that it is no longer safe for me to be alone, I will believe them and not become defensive.
  5. If I am unable to get along with my children, I will seek counseling so we can learn to manage the changes in my life together.
  6. I will get my legal affairs in order and trust the advice of professionals so there will be no problems about money or property down the road.
  7. I will not complain about feeling poorly. My children cannot fix my health, and such complaints are emotionally draining for them to hear.
  8. My children are not my indentured servants. I will remember to thank them for everything they do for me, and I will do loving things in return.
  9. I will avoid making my children feel guilty. Age is no excuse for insults and manipulative behavior.
  10. For as long as I can, I will take good care of myself physically, dress well and carry myself with dignity. Nothing saddens a child more than to witness parents who give up on how they present themselves.
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  Publications Dr. Kenner has written many articles and presented many seminars and courses around the country. She is co-author of a serious guidebook on romance and has produced over 500 podcasts. See search bar above for topics.    

Courses and Seminars
What is Happiness

Humor How humor can help or hurt your chances for happiness
Emotions Emotions and logic are allies in your search for happiness
Terrorism Sometimes the way we cope with terrorism in our own minds and the way we deal with it socially have the opposite effect we intend

Dr. Kenner is a licensed psychologist with an active private practice. Below you can find a therapist and good self-help books. Cognitive Therapy is the gold standard of psychology. Find a Cognitive Therapist anywhere in the country.    

Therapy In Rhode Island
Therapy Outside Rhode Island
How to Choose a Therapist
About Dr. Kenner
What is Happiness

Ask Dr. Kenner a Question
Definitions Explanations of various
points discussed in this web site
Self-Help Articles

Obstacles to Happiness are not always obvious
Understand Your Emotions Emotions and logic are allies in your search for happiness

Thinking Skills (Under Construction) Happiness requires that you are satisfied that your mind deals with people and events in a rational manner
Valuing Skills (Under Construction) Happiness requires that you choose only rational values to seek out and work to obtain
Self-Help Books Dr. Kenner reviews books and audio she recommends on parenting, therapy, self help, career, romance, happiness and other topics.
Self-Help CDs

  Radio Show Hear Dr. Kenner's show The Rational Basis of Happiness® on many radio stations coast to coast and online. Times of day and days of week vary from station to station. In her 15th year on air, she has been a "top 250" talk show host for the past six years.    
About the Show
Call in to the Radio Show
Ask Dr. Kenner a Question
See the Show
Radio Station List
Recent Podcasts
Search 500 Podcasts
Subscribe to Podcast
The Rational Basis of Happiness® and The Rational Basis® are registered trademarks of Dr. Ellen Kenner. This web site and its contents are copyrighted and are proprietary products of Dr. Ellen Kenner. Any  unauthorized use, reproduction, or transfer of this web site or its contents, in any medium, is strictly prohibited.
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